Titles of 'Mommy' and 'Daddy'--- Best Gift Ever!!

Things are moving so fast!  What’s that saying, hurry up and wait?  We’re in hurry up and hurry up right now!

What our family desires most is your love, prayers and support.  If you feel compelled to go beyond, know that we are truly grateful.   We have decided to pass on any baby showers in lieu of support to bring Baby Boy home.  Adoptions hold an amazing power of bringing together a community.  It’s beautiful how one beautiful little heart can connect so many. 

For a number of reasons specific to our situation, we’ve decided not to register.  We’ve spent a few years gathering the essentials.  Also, so much of what is out there is newborn stuff (i.e. We have no use for a breast pump!)  For baby boy's sake, we won't be introducing too many 'things' too fast so there’s a good chance items would go unused. 

There are very few things I enjoy shopping for more than a good friend/family’s new baby (c’mon ladies, ya’ll know finding the right bra is an amazing day).  However, we ask that baby boy’s situation calls you to consider the true necessity of a $4 card, a $3 bag, a $10 gift...  Baby boy comes from a tough situation.

Much of our adoption costs go toward supporting our baby’s case, our agency which allows for continued matching of other orphaned babes to their forever families, and supporting baby boy's current home and the amazing people who are caring for him at this moment.  Of course travel costs and time away from work come in to play as well.

If you find yourself drawn to support, please send your donation to the address below with a note about where you’d like the money allocated to (i.e. Lang Family Adoption).  Every penny you designate will go directly toward baby boy.  You will receive a receipt that can be used for tax purposes.  We have roughly $18,000 left to pay not considering travel costs...a daunting number, but we know God will provide.  Baby boy is worth every penny!

We have mere weeks (yikes!) to take care of the financials and we appreciate your prayers as we navigate our way through.  But, there is a face, a beating heart at the end of this crazy journey.  This child is already more loved than he will ever know.  Our struggles have led us here and we couldn’t be more genuinely happy....terrified....but happy!     

All our love,
Tony & Kelly

Across the World Adoptions
395 Taylor Boulevard, Suite 116
Pleasant Hill, CA 94523

Happy New Year!

Although 2013 was quite possibly the hardest year of our lives, we also learned a lot about ourselves and our faith.  I went from spending Christmas Eve completely shaken, to New Years Eve with the most amazing news of our lives!

We are happy to announce that we are the proud new parents of a baby BOY!  Baby boy is around 15-18 months old and is waiting for us right now.  We couldn't be happier and although we know and understand there are still hurdles to jump over & potential obstacles, we have faith that our journey will connect us and bind us together as a family.   We are hoping to travel in March.  Yikes, March!!!

There is so much to do and so much to tell!  Due to a variety of reasons, we have left our current agency and joined a new one.  Our new agency operates on a 'waiting child' premise versus our old agency which was a 'waiting family' program.  'Waiting Children' programs tend to work around those children who are harder to place.  The details are very jumbled/complicated so for our purposes today, we're just going to move forward towards BABY BOY! 

Waiting Mama...Holiday Time (again)

Forget the paperwork.  Forget the money.  Forget the time.  I speak to you today from the very bottom of my very battered and bruised heart.  The reality is, for our waiting family, the holidays are brutal.  At this point, I feel the need to offer my apologies because I grow nervous that some will take offense.  However, after three years of consoling others about our situation, I feel the need to give it straight, if not for anyone but myself, or maybe others who can empathize with our struggle.  It's exhausting pretending to be happy...plus I'm not that good of an actress.

I will smile, and laugh, and feel genuine happiness during this time.  Yet underneath everything, is a thickening layer of ache.  A widening want for the Christmas morning I am awoken too early by my overly eager little and sleepily watch as they reveal the contents of their stocking.  I cannot describe this ache, it goes well beyond anything else I have ever wanted in my life.  It's an empty feeling, like someone drained my insides.  Being a mother w/o a child is a hollow feeling. 

It's not Christmas that's the problem.  The real deal is that holidays are time markers....letting us know that more days/weeks/months have passed.  This is the third holiday season we are entering on this journey.  We have joyously watched as countless friends and family have welcomed babies over the years and continue to do so.  The happiness we feel for others is in a completely different realm than our sorrow over our own empty crib.

What are we doing to get through it? 

•  LIVE.  eat, sleep, work, play, etc...
• Prepare (when we're up to it...no sense forcing decorating or baby-proofing if we can't enjoy it)
• Care for ourselves (meditate, exercise, eat well, cry)
• Love others from a distance (i.e. hiatus from facebook & other social media sites---remain in touch with few through email & text, send our prayers out daily, and avoid the daily bombardment of photos/announcements/etc...)

 Recommendations for those around us during this difficult time

• LIVE.  eat, work, enjoy life, share good news with us (yes, I've asked friends to share their pregnancy news via email with me----this is just me, but I prefer to react in whatever way feels right at the time for me.  I will call when I think I can handle it.  :) 
• Know that we're SAD, we're not DYING
• Accept our hermit status (being around others asking well-intentioned questions might bring on anxiety)
• Pity is unnecessary.
• Read something on adoption...learn some of the terms we might use
• What can you say?  Like anyone going through a hard time, the best thing I've found is to echo back their feelings.  Saying things like "It will happen when it's supposed to," reminds me of the control I know I don't have. 
• I hesitate to write this last one, because I know it's always said with such good intentions, but please don't tell me as soon as we adopt I'll get pregnant.  It's so easy to say, and I've even bought into it.  The reality is that I've already mourned that part (although adoption for me was never a second best way of building a family---it is one of the ways I've always wanted to build a family)  

All we can do is hope and pray that our post in 365 days from now will be very different from today's. 

A most blessed and happy holidays to all.
Our thoughts and prayers are with our family and friends and of course, our little one(s) waiting on us.  We're doing everything we can baby. 

Nkwagala (I love you)

"If I have ever seen magic, it has been in Africa." -John Hemingway

Orphan Sunday, 2013

We haven't posted for so long!  Each year, the beginning of the school year always zooms by and before we know it, the holidays are approaching!

Truth be told, there hasn't been any information to share.  We've been made aware that we will most likely not get our referral until the new year.  As always, we continue to try and understand this journey and accept that we have no control over this part of our lives.   The coming holidays are most likely going to prove difficult.  Holidays (any and all and sometimes, none) can prove extremely difficult to those waiting on a child.  Yes, I broke down on the 4th of July this year...  We ask for your prayers and understanding during this very difficult time for us.

 Below is a video a fellow adoptive family made.  It's beautiful.  

 

Joy! Joy! Joy!

The next best thing to learning about our own adoptive future, is experiencing the joy of other adoptive families!  To know that another child has found their forever home and another family feels complete.  A week from Monday, I am privileged to attend my very first airport party for a friend returning home with her daughter.  I cannot wait to see the joy on her face!

I cannot stress how important making connections with other adoptive families is during this journey.  Although we are all on different roads, they all lead to family.  The support we give one another during this amazingly difficult journey is an absolute necessity! 

First Day of School!

This time of year is always filled with a range of emotions for us.  Excitement about the awesome kids we're going to have in our classrooms this year, nervousness about how we'll meet their needs, bummers that we can't sleep in anymore...  This year, however, we are faced with a new emotion.  Tony and I spend our days taking care of other people's children.  Now that we are (hopefully) on the cusp of becoming parents ourselves, it's creeping into our consciousness that others will soon be the teachers and caretakers of our children.  With that in mind, we go into this year with the mindset that the little ones coming into our room are someone else's whole world.  Although we have known this before, our awareness is heightened.  I can't wait to support all the amazing work the parents of my students have already done and become a partner in the success of their children!  :)  Happy school year everyone!

Waiting to Be Rescued

When Fridays come, I used to think it was a reprieve.  Spending the entire week waiting for 'The Call' is seriously exhausting.  However, on Friday evenings, I find myself stressed that I now have to wait for two days before we can wait again. 

Please pray that we receive a referral next week.  We are ready to be rescued.